Fucking Christ, I'm sorry........

[SHUT UP AND DIE]

I feel as though I should be erased from this planet. I feel as though nothing but sheer hate is my companion. I feel that everyone I know both online and in the actual world hates me. Those that know me won't tell me, but they think it......I feel less than nothing for my life or those I have considered my friends, which displays what a shit friend I can be. This is mostly a real-life declaration I am making.....but it also applies to those who are in the "fake realm" , ie Vish, etc..........


I'm going to bed and I don't know what to do.....I'm queer for even making this thread..........fucking hell.....Nathan, PM my sorry ass.............

[Mark Carras]

Honestly, I thought you were doing way better. We are a pretty easy going bunch and if you are trying we won't jump on ya for it. Cheers. :beer

[Vish]

Honestly, I thought you were doing way better. We are a pretty easy going bunch and if you are trying we won't jump on ya for it. Cheers. :beer

im not sure if he is meaning this site as much as life in general, mark.

i tried calling joey an hour ago. hopefully he'll call me back soon.

[Mark Carras]

im not sure if he is meaning this site as much as life in general, mark.

i tried calling joey an hour ago. hopefully he'll call me back soon.

Yeah, I know. I was just trying to let him know that someone notices that he is trying to be a better person. His efforts have not went unnoticed and are very much appreciated. :cool

We live in a fucked up world and it makes us all pretty pissy sometimes. So it's easy to let the asshole in all of us take over. All of us are guilty of that. Joey is a good guy and he has shown that in the past few weeks. I just want him to know so he doesn't get down on himself. We all have a bad side.

[SHUT UP AND DIE]

Good lord, I should learn to keep my mouth shut when I drink.....woops. I've always suffered from depression, and occassionally I voice my inner thoughts too much......sorry 'bout that. Shoulda left it off here......but thanks for calling anyways Vish....sorry I didn't get it. Anyways, thanks for the kind words, Mark....and yeah, I've been trying not to be a fuckhead so much here lately.

[Vish]

Good lord, I should learn to keep my mouth shut when I drink.....woops. I've always suffered from depression, and occassionally I voice my inner thoughts too much......sorry 'bout that. Shoulda left it off here......but thanks for calling anyways Vish....sorry I didn't get it. Anyways, thanks for the kind words, Mark....and yeah, I've been trying not to be a fuckhead so much here lately.

well, like it or not, im your friend, so of course i am going to call when i see something like that being posted.

dude, you arent alone with the whole depression thing. i go through serious bouts of depression that are damn near crippling.

i hope you are doing better today. im going to call you tonight.

[SHUT UP AND DIE]

Thanks, dude. I'll be home around 8:15 pm your time. It would be good to talk....depression sucks balls.

[Mark Carras]

depression does indeed sucks balls. I have always fought it my entire life. When I tried to do that festival a few years ago it got really bad. I would say something thinking I was being light hearted, but it would come out bitter and nasty. It scares me thinking back on how low I got.

Hope is the most valuable thing a person can have. Without hope for something better we would all crumble and die.

[Bonehead]

Joey....we may not see eye to eye on, well, much of anything. But if you need someone else to talk with or bounce thoughts off of, I would be happy to talk with you. If you would, I could either call you or give you my phone number. Let me know.

I have said it before on these forums, but I think it was before you came here. But I believe strongly that what we fill our lives with, in the forms of the entertainment that we partake, comes back out of us. In other words, if you fill your mind with negative movies, tv, music, books, and the like, then your mind accepts that as it's normal state. Obviously, I like metal in many forms including death and black, but they aren't the only styles of music I listen to. It is all about balance. Enjoy the dark stuff, but find some good, light, happy things to balance it out. Just like you can't eat all fattening foods just because they are your favorite, you have to have a balanced, healthy diet for good physical health. The same principles work for psychological health....there has to be balance. This would, of course, also include the emotions that we choose to dwell on. If you find yourself angry, take steps to embrace something that makes you happy.

I know....I don't know you and what you have gone through. And you have every right to tell me to go to hell. But I feel that I have learned something about life and how our brains work in my many years on this planet, and I only wish to share with you some things that I know work.

Send me a PM if you would like to talk.

[Mythos Inibri]

Bad acid trip?:hmmm

I've been there before....

[SHUT UP AND DIE]

Thanks for the kind words Bonehead.....maybe someday soon we can have that talk. And no, I wouldn't tell you to go to hell just for trying to be helpful. :p

And Vish, I definitely appreciate talkin' to ya last night, man. Had a good laugh and I feel much better, bro. I even woke up this morning feelin' better.

[Vish]

Thanks for the kind words Bonehead.....maybe someday soon we can have that talk. And no, I wouldn't tell you to go to hell just for trying to be helpful. :p

And Vish, I definitely appreciate talkin' to ya last night, man. Had a good laugh and I feel much better, bro. I even woke up this morning feelin' better.

glad to hear it man. sometimes a person just needs a friend to talk to... and get that little gay guy out of em.

[fuzzay crisis]

dude, i dunno, i always thought you were very intelligent and interesting. maybe you don't see it, but i deffinitely do. i hope you feel better. i'm here to talk if you need. the world shits on me too, thus i shit on it back! so we may have a lot more in common than you think. :P

[SHUT UP AND DIE]

Hey, I just want to say that the level of supportiveness from the core members of this site is very cool. Even though I inconvenienced you guys with my BS one night, you have all still been very cool, and for that I owe you a "Thank You".

So: Thank You.


Mark, Bonehead, Vish, Fuzzay.......

[Mark Carras]

Hey, I just want to say that the level of supportiveness from the core members of this site is very cool. Even though I inconvenienced you guys with my BS one night, you have all still been very cool, and for that I owe you a "Thank You".

So: Thank You.


Mark, Bonehead, Vish, Fuzzay.......

Good, so when ya gonna start flooding us with reviews again? :P

[SHUT UP AND DIE]

Good, so when ya gonna start flooding us with reviews again? :P

As soon as I can get motivated and grab some time/necessary things.... like headphones, batteries, etc. I know you need your things, but to be honest.....there was a lot of crap in that last package (not a reflection of you, of course...I'm just saying...there are more than a couple of shit bands) so getting through it is....well....not the most comfortable of ventures.


But they'll be coming.....sometime soon.....

[Mark Carras]

As soon as I can get motivated and grab some time/necessary things.... like headphones, batteries, etc. I know you need your things, but to be honest.....there was a lot of crap in that last package (not a reflection of you, of course...I'm just saying...there are more than a couple of shit bands) so getting through it is....well....not the most comfortable of ventures.


But they'll be coming.....sometime soon.....

Yeah, I always try to do my best to send stuff writers will like. It does me no good to do otherwise because then I get bored writers and pissed off press agents. But if the band sucks then the band sucks. In Theory is a perfect example. That contact is VERY important, so I smoothed things over by doing an interview. Sure that interview made them look even worse, but the press agent was happy and we all got a good laugh. :rotfl

So I know it sucks with some of those, but as long as you make it more about the why and less about the opinion there is zero problem with a negative review.

Lastly, things are starting to pick up here as far as money goes. So I might be able to buy some interview equipment if you would be interested in doing phone interviews. I feel like a douche interviewing death metal bands. I would rather have the interview be done by someone that is passionate about the band. I would just set it up so that you steal any interview of a band that you love more then me. If not I understand. Just thought I would offer.

[tbhride]

Hey, I just want to say that the level of supportiveness from the core members of this site is very cool. Even though I inconvenienced you guys with my BS one night

Don't worry about that stuff. If you can put it behind you, so can we :monkeythumb

[SHUT UP AND DIE]

Don't worry about that stuff. If you can put it behind you, so can we :monkeythumb

Thanks, man....that's cool. I've just been so filled with hostility and aggravation lately. Not a day goes by it seems where I don't have a conflict with someone (either in the real world or online or more usually: both) for what seems to be no reason.....I'm just pissed all the time at everything. Anyways...just need to get more gear to listen to some cd's and crank some reviews out.